"If a person isn't loving and kind it shows that he doesn't know God-for God is love" 1 John 4:8 (TLB)
When I read that verse this morning, it hit me like a brick! I have not been the most loving person lately. Well, let me put it this way, I am a compassionate person who really loves and cares about others...but it has been covering up cattiness.
That may sound kind of confusing. In most situations, I have the sincere compassion but lately I have also had an "attitude" about other situations or towards other people. I became familiar with the term "snarky" as my son came home from school one day talking about someone who was snarky. Then I discovered a blog a lady is writing entitled, "Snarky in the Suburbs". I laughed as I read that title because I just think the word "snarky" is a funny sounding description of someone with an attitude.
I have even joked with my son that I am in a "snarky" mood (or whatever) some days. But today when I read 1 John 4:8...If a person isn't loving and kind it shows he doesn't know God for God is love...I was reminded of my sister Cheryl and how everyone who knew her said they had never heard her say anything bad of anyone...that she was ALWAYS loving...and she was!
I sat down and had a heart to heart with God...He knew I had not been having the best attitudes about some people or that I have simply been catty...so He and I talked about that...how I need to change that. I told him...I know it is a "heart condition" but that the "heart" begins in the mind...so then that took my mind to Romans 12...I need a renewing of my mind (daily)...He and I talked about renewing my mind...keeping it focused on Him and the things that truly matter...then my "heart" will speak through my mouth...and I will be loving...like He is.
Sure anyone can "act" loving and kind...but it is in one's mind and heart where the truth resides. Daily, I will need to pray for a renewed mind...to be loving. "Snarky" may be a funny sounding word for "having an attitude"...but..."Loving" is the attitude I want!
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I started attending the Sunday worships 4 weeks ago.A sweet boy, whose name I later learned was Jesse, greeted me several times, and I thought "What a precious person. what complete love I see coming from him." If I felt unsure he calmed my anxiety. My 2nd visit, he was not there. I honestly couldnt wait to see his unconditionally loving face again. I have searched for a congregation that I am comfortable with, and for various reasons the other churches seemed unwelcoming. We are all human, and well, snarky happens ;). No one is perfect. At times I still wonder if I am accepted yet, many women come over and sit with me, during fellowship, and I am very happy about that.They reach for me, and since I am alone there, I never know where to sit.That really helps that they sit by me. I still have a few that I am feeling negative vibes from, but this is for ME.This is MY opportunity to finally worship with good people.I guess if I let the ones I think dont like me, run me off, than the devil wins. Jesus lead me to Free Methodist twice. once invited to a Wed. nite class, with Mrs. Web. Then Sunday evenings with my neighbors, they let me go with them 2 times. I decided that even tho very sick most of the time, I set the alarm early, so I can make the services and bible study, and always am happy I went. May God bless you, my saviour sister! <3
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